elitists piss me off.

I've decided, I'm not going to go to my formal this year.

I don't want the hassle of having to interact with people i don't want to see ever again after the year is done. people at my school are annoying, and self centred. it wont matter to them, that I'm not there. all they care about is if their 40-something yr old boyfriends or their trophy girls are on their arms. i suppose that's all we really are to most people; an accessory. they only want us around if they find us helpful to their image. it is becoming more and more apparent to me that these people we call friends, that make up the fragments of us, most of the time we have no legitimate reason to have them around, other than to make us feel good.

just before the holidays, someone who i thought was a friend of mine made a personal attack against another that i called a good friend. this angered me, as i rushed to the defence of my "accessory", and was told to basically chose between friends. it is at this point where i began to question the legitimacy of the frendship i was in. if these two people really cared about my wellbeing and how i felt, then they would have said, "okay, we just wont see you while the other of us is there." but the world isnt so quick to come to a compromise. in the end i had to make a chioce, because both people wanted all or nothing. this had a ripple effect on the friendships based on the ones i had to choose between, and many people were angry with me.

im still confused as to why these tertiary friends chose to get involved, as what had happened didnt directlym affect their self image. acutally, maybe it did. these two people would have pushed the tertiaries, saying how i was with "that girl" rather than this one. its for this exact reason that i dont want to be a part of the school society anymore, i just want to get in, do my time, and get out. nothing more.